I've had a Twitter account since October 16, 2008. Behold, humans, my first tweet: "downloading music/working on annotated bibliography!" My next tweet was on April 20, 2009: "is really confused by this twiter thing." For about the first three years of my Twitter account, I would occasionally, blissfully tweet whatever my heart so desired. I followed maybe ten people, mostly celebrities, and went on my account whenever Facebook was giving me the peeves.
That was then. I'm a different woman now.
In my year and a half of being a self-proclaimed expert tweeter, I have started following more accounts. I have also grabbed a couple more followers, and I pity those poor souls who willingly subject themselves to my ridiculous brain. This post is dedicated to them.
I came up with 28 different Twitterers. Take a deep breath:
1. The one who tweets to celebrites every day. I do not follow these people. They make me angry right in my very bones.
2. The one who tweets to Justin Bieber every day. This is a whole new type of crazy.
3.The one who tweets many a giveaway.
4. The blogger who only uses Twitter to promote their newest blog post.
5. The blogger who only uses Twitter to promote their newest blog post......five or more times a day.
6. The one who live-tweets their entire life.
7. The #one who #hashtags every #word they #think will grab them #new #followers.
8. The one who engages in Twitter fights. I do not understand this kind of person. When I get into arguments, I usually have more to say than can fit in 140 characters.
9. The one who participates in trending topics.
10. The one who uses Twitter as a journal. (Twitter is not the new Facebook, dumbs)
11. The random who has over 10,000 followers and you cannot figure out how that even happened
12. The one who follows the One Direction boys. (me)
13. The one who plays the follow/unfollow game like their life depended on it.
14. The one who uses emojis. I like these ones.
15. The one who includes punctuation in their hashtags. It may be slightly OCD of me, but it drives me nuts to only see half of a smooshed together sentence linked. #twitteristheonlyplacewedon'tusecorrectpunctuation. See?? Stop doing it.
16. The one who retweets everything. In other words, the one I promptly unfollow.
17. The one whose entire Twitter feed is Instagram links.
18. The prolific tweeter who has a grand total of 16 followers....mostly bots.
19. The one who tweets deliciously inappropriate subject matter.
20. The one who tweets lyrics. I do this one.
22. The one who crowd sources for reliable information. #thatswhywehavegoogle
23. The one who cryptic tweets.
24. The one who tweets about Twitter. See also: Facebooking about Facebook, blogging about blogs
25. The one who hate-tweets.
26. The one who sub-tweets. (I don't even know what this one is, but I hear it all the time.)
27. The one who strives to be the first one to tweet about any national tragedy.*
28. The one who uses multiple tweets to get across one thought. I am confused.
So, do you agree? Which ones do you fall into? Don't worry, I definitely do at least 1/3 of these things, so I won't judge you. Probably.
Also in my Social Media Users series:
*Please know I originally wrote this post last Thursday. In light of yesterday's tragic tornados, I have donated $10 to Red Cross yesterday by texting REDCROSS to 90999.